Sawayama and The Truth: A Play in One Act
(EXT: the porch of a nondescript house in the suburbs of any mid-sized town in America. Two flamboyantly dressed teenagers MADDIE and FLACA knock on the door and giggle to themselves. As the door is opened, they quickly put on their game faces. HOMEOWNER opens the door and is clearly surprised by who is knocking.)
HOMEOWNER: Yes?
MADDIE: Hi! I am Maddie and this is Flaca…
(Flaca performs a curtsy which ends with the subtle scrape of her high-heeled boot)
MADDIE: …We are in the neighborhood today spreading good news for our church, The Congregation of Everlasting Pop Deconstruction. Can I ask, have you've accepted Rina Sawayama as your lord and savior in these troubled times of vapid pop personalities and pointless aesthetics?
HOMEOWNER: (very visibly confused) Oh, well…I don't know, I guess we never really thought about it that much. We tend to listen to 90's radio hits in this house, so I suppose we've never really thought of…sorry, Rita…? I missed that part…?
MADDIE: Rina. Rina Sawayama. Rina is the world's newest pop sensation! She hails from Japan by way of Great Britain, and she is building a stunning body of work by repurposing elements traditionally found in other styles of music, like crunchy guitars and chamber-worthy string sections, in the service of something more true, something more real. And her message is hard to ignore. We'd absolutely love to tell you about if you have a few moments. (Maddie leans close, attempting to look past Homeowner's shoulder in order to see if the house is empty) Would it be possible for us to come in and tell you and your family more about our mission and the new world Rina wants to create for all of us?
HOMEOWNER: Oh, I don't know. I have some errands to run soon, and I was just doing some laundry. So maybe now isn't a great--
MADDIE: (cutting off Homeowner) Oh, no worries! This won't take long at all! (Maddie efficiently produces a pamphlet from behind her back and opens it, pointing as she speaks) I can show you right here. Now, you said you and your family were 90's fans, yes?
HOMEOWNER: (hesitates a beat before answering) Yes…
MADDIE: (starts right in) Exactly! See here in article 3.7, sub clause A-3, the Dogma shows very clearly how Rina will use that pummeling low-end nu-metal guitar sound to effortlessly make songs that will give listeners a sonic whiplash they can believe in while delivering actionable and affirming lifestyle encouragement. Flaca?
FLACA: (makes a quick tap on a phone, "STFU!" blares loudly)
MADDIE: (smiling broadly, raises voice to be heard over music) See? And this is an anthem of achieving self-love by discouraging the negativity of others! Amazing, right?
HOMEOWNER: (still confused, and growing visibly uncomfortable from the noise) OK, sure, sure. Can you turn that down a bit?
(Flaca makes another quick tap and the audio cuts out abruptly)
MADDIE: (sensing that their welcome is wearing thin) You see, Flaca and I--
(Flaca looks up from phone to wink at Homeowner upon hearing her name)
MADDIE: --we came to Rina and the Congregation after having been misguided for many years on our journey to pop music enlightenment. We stumbled through the new-age morality tales of Lady Gaga. We followed Grimes closely for a time but eventually felt like some of the politics there got inconsistent and sketchy. We partied with Gossip and had a lot of fun, but then we realized we were in it for more than the parties and the excess. Fiona Apple and FKA Twigs sat in ivory towers we didn't always want to join them in. We needed a real message, made for us - we needed the Truth. Rina Sawayama gave us that, and so did studying the Dogma and being part of the Congregation. If we hadn’t found the church, we'd probably be wasting away in a coffee shop nodding off to sleep with Julien Baker in our earbuds. We needed this as pop fans, and we feel like it's our duty to help as many people as we can to know the comfort we found in those truths. So will you allow us to help you today by giving you some resources you can use to educate yourself about how the Sawayama Dogma compares to the pop modes you are currently engaging with? We think that you'll be happy you took the info!
HOMEOWNER: (looking to end this conversation) Yeah, OK, sure. Go ahead and leave some stuff. I'll look over it, and if my family and I feel like hearing more, we can reach out.
MADDIE: (beaming ecstatically) Oh awesome! Thanks so much, you won't regret it! Here are some lyric sheets and download cards for you and your loved ones…
(Maddie hands papers to Homeowner)
MADDIE: …and whenever you need more, or just want some more info, please feel free to just text me directly, my number is on that top card!
HOMEOWNER: (takes papers) OK, thank you. Have a ni--
MADDIE: Sorry, you wouldn't happen to know if anyone else in the neighborhood may be interested in hearing the Truth of Sawayama, would you?
HOMEOWNER: (thinks a moment) Uhh, no, not that I can-- Oh, actually, you know what? I heard the Harrison's playing J-Lo the other day, maybe they could use information on this. Two doors down, same side of the street.
MADDIE: Old stuff or late period?
HOMEOWNER: (thinks) Um…I think it was "Jenny From The Block"…? Don't quote me on that though.
MADDIE: (gives a serious look to Flaca) All right, Flaca, sounds like we may have another case of "Y2K." Let's go.
(Flaca exaggeratedly rolls eyes as both turn to leave)
MADDIE: (turns again to Homeowner) Thanks again! I look forward to seeing you at Saturday night service sometime soon! This coming weekend is The Feast of The Dynasty, one of our highest holy days, maybe we'll see you there! Bring glowsticks, if you have them!
(Homeowner waves politely as Maddie and Flaca walk off porch and out of sight)
HOMEOWNER: (muttering to self) Glowsticks. Like we'd forget glowsticks. Ugh, some peoples' kids…
(Homeowner closes only the screen door and heads back inside. After a couple of moments, the intro to "XS" is unmistakably audible from the interior of the house.)
END
